Area Man Menaced by Latex Glove
So I am minding my own business, trying to run some errands during my lunch hour last week, when another reminder that I am 40 was shoved in my face.
Outside of the Blaine Super Target, I am thinking about toothpaste and 60 watt light bulbs when all of a sudden a gust of wind swirls. As though animated by an invisible hand, this purple exam glove rises up and flutters toward me. I stop like a dog cornered by an upright vacuum cleaner, unable to move, unsure if it was going to perform an unauthorized routine medical procedure on me or retreat.
The wind died down and I made a break for the store. I didn't look back until I was safely behind the automatic doors. It did not follow me in.
Honestly - I had just begun to get comfortable with turning forty and now Dr. Pokeyfinger's henchman tries to assault me in the parking lot. It is almost enough to make a guy take care of his own medical procedures.  (See Related Story)

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